I hesitated before posting this. I think that’s a sign of respect for a marketing organization, when you worry about posting anything about them, for fear of generating a (very) strong reaction. It’s like posting about Savage Nation – I halfway expect (very polite, writ-armed) screaming hordes of barbarians at my (virtual) gates.

That said, the irony is that whatever my personal feelings about the “Religion” of Scientology, and cults in general (ooops, did I give away my opinion there? Hey, in the spirit of the topic, I can change that opinion if someone’s willing to buy enough of my books) I have to admire their marketing success. They’ve built an empire around… something. A set of ideas. Not even a service or a product per se. Wow.

In the spirit of my “top 10” list post on Ikea, here are the top 10 lessons you can learn about amazingly powerful marketing by looking at the Scientologists.

10. Get Endorsements.  Yes, it certainly helps to have movie stars talking about your product – and even better when they do it "for free".  You can do this too – create a product that lets people connect on some level with the stars. The stars feel good about themselves, they get support staff, fans – and the fans feel good about associating with the stars. It’s like any good indie film = fame generates fame, aka PR.

9. Be Non-Intrusive.  As religions / organizations / cults / businesses / whatever go, the Scientologists are wonderfully non-intrusive. They don’t ring your doorbell on Saturday mornings. They don’t stand on street-corners and shout at you. They’re not in your face. Most people have an instinctive negative reaction to pushed product. Subtlty is powerful.

8. Be Persistent.  Number 9 said, they are persistent. Once on a mailing list, you’ll get small, inexpensive reminders and invitations for an unusually long time. Like water dripping, the product tickler is always there. Persistence can work well, as long as the payoff balances the total marketing spend.

7. Be Ubiquitous.  When you can’t escape the product presence – when reminders and samples of it are easily available on every corner, postered on every wall, in every bookstore, your awareness and eventual ascension to the product is inevitable. Just ask Starbucks, McDonalds, or Coca-Cola.

6. More channels = more sales. When your product comes in multiple forms – books, movies, storefronts, people – it has just that many more ways to reach you. Drug dealers learned this years ago, and coffee-vendors caught on shortly thereafter. How many coffee-flavored things can you name… edible or otherwise?

5. Get Personal. People respond best to people. If you can engage an army of marketers & salespeople at zero cost to your company, you’ll have good success. For even better success, as Cutco has demonstrated, have your salespeople pay you (by buying their own display kits) to join.

4. Exert Tight Message Control.  Any major brand knows that the secret to great PR is to ensure any and all images of them as portrayed in “official” media are consistent and positive – and negative views are sufficiently controlled and suppressed that they end up all being rumors.

3. Ensure Your Sales Pitch Is Inoffensive. If there’s nothing to object to, there’s no objections to your beginning a relationship with a potential sale. Who wouldn’t want a free demo of that vacuum cleaner, a chance to win $1mm – or a free stress test?

2. Ensure Your Sales Pitch Has Universal Appeal. A stress test? Guidance? Help? Who wouldn’t want these things!

1. Last but not least, Be Well Funded. Given two marketing campaigns otherwise identical, the one with more coverage wins (just watch the presidential elections). Remember, when all else is put aside, money talks.

Enjoy, and say hi to L. Ron Hubbard and those nice people down at the bookstore for me…

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