I rarely find things to laugh at on the early-morning equivalent of a redeye flight. JFK airport in New York City is just not funny at 5:45 am. But as I settled into my seat, the restroom announcement on the flight made me crack a brief grin.

Why? United Airlines’ great claim that folks in economy and business class should stick to using the restrooms in their section “for security reasons”.

What nonsense. Airlines only started using that justification (substantially) after 9/11, and it annoys me about as much as any other company tacking on buzzwords like “security”, “compliance”, “information management”, or any other topic of passing national interest that has absolutely nothing to do with the company’s offerings core value.

Folks, marketing is about education. It’s about cutting through the daily hum of data that the media spews forth, to reach the people who need your offering. Tacking your product onto a hot news topic just so you can get people to look at you is like featuring naked pole dancers at a trade show booth – its viral in the evil sense; parasitical, not clever.

Think about it. If you have a legitimate security product – let’s say, a bomb-sniffer – how much harder is it to reach your target audience if they’re being swamped by marketing claiming everything from rubber gloves and duct tape to freeze-dried peas is “security related”?